"As parents, we want to raise our children to be kind, compassionate, responsible, honest, and respectful. We might even have made the time to define some family values, to be more intentional about what morals we really want to impart to our children. We want our children to be good people, to contribute to the world in positive ways."
But why do we want these things for them? Because we ourselves believe that this is the path to success and happiness in the real world. Believing that, it makes sense to model these qualities and to recommend them to our children while they are very young and in need of a place to begin, so to speak. But let us remember that what they need most of all is the freedom to choose their own values, as soon as they are able.
That is so very true! Deciding who you are - what you like, what you want to achieve, and what you value - really is the work of growing up! Just like I wouldn't force my child to be a doctor or a lawyer because that's what I believe is good for them, I also wouldn't want to force my values onto them. In saying that, I do hope that they take on at least some of the values that I hold dear, mostly because I can look back on my life so far and see how those values have brought me happiness and helped me define what success means for me.
Re:
"As parents, we want to raise our children to be kind, compassionate, responsible, honest, and respectful. We might even have made the time to define some family values, to be more intentional about what morals we really want to impart to our children. We want our children to be good people, to contribute to the world in positive ways."
But why do we want these things for them? Because we ourselves believe that this is the path to success and happiness in the real world. Believing that, it makes sense to model these qualities and to recommend them to our children while they are very young and in need of a place to begin, so to speak. But let us remember that what they need most of all is the freedom to choose their own values, as soon as they are able.
That is so very true! Deciding who you are - what you like, what you want to achieve, and what you value - really is the work of growing up! Just like I wouldn't force my child to be a doctor or a lawyer because that's what I believe is good for them, I also wouldn't want to force my values onto them. In saying that, I do hope that they take on at least some of the values that I hold dear, mostly because I can look back on my life so far and see how those values have brought me happiness and helped me define what success means for me.