How would you adapt this to a child with a developmental delay who has poor self-awareness and awareness of what others might feel? I can see that if the situation is happening right now, you might be able to catch it and communicate clearly and in context about how it makes you feel and might make the other person feel, but doing that later seems like a waste of time. Have you seen good articles on that?
I'd adapt it the same way I'd adapt it for a toddler!
For example, with fostering acceptable behaviour, we might need to do most of the exploring the cause of the misbehaviour by ourselves, but we can still explain why it wasn't appropriate and empower them to make reparations. Or if it's a recurring issue, we might need to do our bit to change the environment to limit the misbehaviour occurring in the first place.
And with teaching morals, we can allow them as much autonomy as they're ready for. Less for younger kids and those with significant development delay (so maybe choosing what colour pants they'd like to wear out of predetermined options), and more for bigger kids (full control over their outfit choice, even if that means they're wearing shorts in the middle of winter).
The functions of any behaviour are so important to understand, otherwise we can’t teach them a more effective way to communicate what they need. Too often our own perspectives are attached to children, which isn’t useful.
Exactly! All behaviour is communication. Just like parents need to decode their toddlers sentences so everyone else can understand, it's also our job to decode our children's behaviour so they can learn to understand what is driving them
Totally agree but not understood at all. We need to upgrade their code. If they don't have the skills to decode our information and then use their own code effectively, that's probably 90% of challenging behaviour (guess obviously)
How would you adapt this to a child with a developmental delay who has poor self-awareness and awareness of what others might feel? I can see that if the situation is happening right now, you might be able to catch it and communicate clearly and in context about how it makes you feel and might make the other person feel, but doing that later seems like a waste of time. Have you seen good articles on that?
I'd adapt it the same way I'd adapt it for a toddler!
For example, with fostering acceptable behaviour, we might need to do most of the exploring the cause of the misbehaviour by ourselves, but we can still explain why it wasn't appropriate and empower them to make reparations. Or if it's a recurring issue, we might need to do our bit to change the environment to limit the misbehaviour occurring in the first place.
And with teaching morals, we can allow them as much autonomy as they're ready for. Less for younger kids and those with significant development delay (so maybe choosing what colour pants they'd like to wear out of predetermined options), and more for bigger kids (full control over their outfit choice, even if that means they're wearing shorts in the middle of winter).
Oh, I love that!
The functions of any behaviour are so important to understand, otherwise we can’t teach them a more effective way to communicate what they need. Too often our own perspectives are attached to children, which isn’t useful.
Exactly! All behaviour is communication. Just like parents need to decode their toddlers sentences so everyone else can understand, it's also our job to decode our children's behaviour so they can learn to understand what is driving them
Totally agree but not understood at all. We need to upgrade their code. If they don't have the skills to decode our information and then use their own code effectively, that's probably 90% of challenging behaviour (guess obviously)